A new love is blooming in Litchfield, along with an exciting new job opportunity. But of course, it’s never all smiles in prison — a new threat is also arising for Piper, and Alex may have to get her hands bloody yet again. But before we get into all that drama, one of Litchfield’s most likable inmates is getting some of the recognition that she deserves.
In the middle of mopping the floors with Morello and Suzanne, Taystee gets called to Caputo’s office. At the suggestion of his boss at MCC, Caputo hires her as his assistant, which basically entails sitting at a desk outside his office, answering phone calls, and just generally following him around and taking notes. But while Taystee is getting hired, Yoga Jones and Anita are calling it quits with Piper’s panty business, saying that they can sense her uneasiness due to the fact that she sold out Stella and hired a bodyguard.
Piper’s business isn’t the only thing coming a bit unhinged. Elsewhere in the yard, Lolly sees Healy showing Judy King around the garden and starts freaking out to Alex, paranoid that they’ll find the hitman’s body buried there. Alex gives Lolly a mantra to recite in order to help her relax, and although she has trouble remembering it, it does seem to calm her down a little. Also upset to see Judy in the garden is Red, who seethes at the new celebrity inmate after she takes some of her crops.
Finally, we move to the episode’s central relationship: Poussey and Soso, who are giggling and shooting hoops until Big Boo comes over to take over the court. Boo refers to them as lesbians, but Poussey quickly corrects her, saying that Soso isn’t a lesbian; “I’m attracted to people,” Soso responds. But as they walk away, Soso tells Poussey that although she doesn’t like labels, she’d be fine if they wanted to call one another girlfriends. Adorably, Poussey responds, “How about we say we’re happy and leave it at that?”
This leads into our backstory du jour. This time we see flashbacks of Brook Soso’s life before Litchfield; she’s training to get signatures on a petition to stop the construction of a planned neighborhood Walmart. During the training session, her acerbic ex-boyfriend, who also happens to be a fellow volunteer, makes a bet with her that she can’t get a registered sex offender who lives nearby to sign the petition. Soso takes the bet, and when she goes to meet the man, she learns that he’s actually a nice guy who’s only on the list of sex offenders because he was caught having sex on a public beach.
NEXT: Caputo gets a reality check