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''House'': Hints and hookups

”House” is back, with carnal entanglements and excruciating side effects from pill popping, plus a discourse on being ”In the Navy”

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Hugh Laurie, House


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”House”: Hints and hookups

Between the doctors appearing shirtless, Chase and Cameron’s not-so-secret sexcapades all over the hospital, and Cuddy and House’s quasi acknowledgement of their single night o’ passion years ago, this episode could have passed for an installment of the good doctor’s beloved General Hospital. The writers seem to be pandering to all the show’s ‘shippers, bringing to the fore every single romantic permutation possible for House, whether it be Cameron, who’s kinda callously using her no-strings arrangement with Chase to make him jealous; Cuddy, who was unusually confident and bold during their innuendo exchange; or even, for the fans, Wilson, with whom he discussed minor details of the Village People’s costume changes in the men’s room. The Cuddy interaction was the most illuminating, since her insistence that he ”get over” her because ”that ship sailed long ago” basically confirms the two have hooked up in the past. (Remembering some guy a colleague once kissed two years ago? I’d say that counts as interested.) Now I realize that soapy dramas are hot; I just don’t want to see the characters being forced into inorganic relationships, as they are on any number of other shows that shall remain nameless.

Plus, House just happened to dream about a specific soldier right before said soldier showed up at his office? Seriously, of all the hospitals in all the towns in all the world…The entire setup was just a tad too convenient.

Seeing a post-Buffy Riley (Marc Blucas), however, was a treat; now we know how he’s been spending his time when not guarding First Daughter Katie Holmes. (Forest Whitaker may be a superb actor, but his directorial instincts are questionable at best.) And okay, I obviously know that this is only a TV show, but I was still relieved to learn that his character didn’t actually have brain and/or parotid cancer, but rather hereditary hemorrhagic telangiectasia, a.k.a. ”crappy sickness X,” a.k.a. a disease of the capillaries that apparently causes, among other symptoms, white foaming bacterial vaginosis in your mouth. Ick.

Speaking of icky situations, not peeing for three days? And inserting your own urinary catheter? Before, albeit imaginarily, releasing a yellow lake all over the floor? I do applaud the decision to realistically show how age and drug abuse are breaking down House’s body, though. As a Vicodin-popping man of 45 (according to Wilson), the bespectacled doc is bound to run into some medical conditions of his own, and this episode didn’t shy away from showing a beaten-down and weathered House ready to order Cameron to shut it or whip out his glasses again (in the tub, no less!).

And, of course, the most important discovery of the entire episode: Wilson is left-handed. And flushes the toilet with his elbow. Who knew?

What do you think? Is romance in House’s future? And what was the reason for that big ol’ grin he was giving at the end?