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''The Hills'': Something almost happens to Whitney

On ”The Hills,” Whitney almost has a story line when she becomes fed up with interning; plus, Lauren meets a regular guy and reconsiders her relationship with Heidi

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The Hills, Whitney Port
The Hills: Sheryl Nields

The Hills

TV Show
Current Status:
In Season
225 minutes
Lauren Conrad
Paramount Home Video
Reality TV

”The Hills”: Something almost happens to Whitney

I’m bored of talking about how gross Spencer is, so we’re not going to do that this week. When it comes to him, I’m out of fresh editorializing; I shall just report the relevant facts. The first being that Spencer asked Heidi to go to Santa Barbara with him for the weekend, and she responded in the affirmative. That’s all you need to know about that for now.

Lisa Love, on the other hand, is full of editorializing, and that is why I love her dearly. ”I’m always wondering why you guys are in spring and I’m in fall,” she cracked when Lauren and Whitney flounced into her office in filmy sundresses while she wore a black leather jacket. Then she seamlessly cut straight to business, as is her way: The girls were to help out with a Vogue photo shoot featuring ”real children.” Big scary Vogue editor Lawren Howell then swooped in on our unsuspecting nymphs to bark such words of wisdom as ”If I grab a dress that hasn’t been steamed and somebody’s standing there, that’s a problem.” This nearly sparked an actual story line for our dear Whitney, who, we just learned, spent two summers doing this intern shtick for W before joining Teen Vogue; I mean, she was, like, so ready to just stop steaming already and start, you know, at least pinning or tucking or ruching or something.

But I was still more wrapped up in the never-ending Heidi-Lauren feud than in watching Whitney debate the downside of de-wrinkling overpriced clothing. And though I feel Lauren’s pain over slowly losing her best friend to an individual named Spencer (about whom I shall state no opinion), she should really look at the upside here: She got that gorgeous apartment to herself for the whole weekend, and then some! Even better, Audrina snuck in to fill that Heidi-shaped void in Lauren’s life with…a blind date! Lauren wasn’t exactly thrilled at first: ”That’s so sad that I’m becoming that friend, like, ‘Maybe he has a friend for you…’ ” But she also saw that she was in no position to turn down opportunities. When Audrina asked, ”What about Brody?” Lauren’s answer was a succinct ”eh.” Amen to that.

Even better: The setup turned out to be quite the doll. Lauren’s date, Blake, and his buddy weren’t exactly models (or a former Olympian’s well-appointed sons), but they were…what’s the word I’m looking for here? Nice. Normal. A little awkward, just like a young ‘un should be on a double-date setup, particularly when there are cameras present. ”This is so nice; I’ve never been here before,” Blake said about the fancy-schmancy restaurant before admiring ”this chandelier setup.” Then, bless his heart, he even asked Lauren where she grew up, and when she answered, ”Orange County,” he said, ”Where in Orange County?” Is it possible he really didn’t know who she was and which MTV reali-drama she was exploited on? Or am I totally naive, and were these guys just playing ”regular” for the damn cameras? Either way, I love the mere possibility that Lauren might find respite with a nice, normal dude. And I’m really starting to love her and Audrina’s blossoming friendship. I mean, she’d resorted to scheduling dinners with her roommate and supposed best friend. Which wouldn’t be so bad if Heidi were off spending time with a total prince, but given that it’s Spencer…not that I have anything to say about him.

Back at the Whitney almost story line, her little sister, Jade, magically got a spot in the ”real kid” photo shoot. Not that the darling didn’t deserve it — she was sporting some seriously gorgeous blond Whitney hair. Whitney rolled her eyes a lot over fetching double-stick tape and pins for the scary Vogue editor, all of which led her to conclude, wisely, ”As much as I love clothes, they’re only clothes.”

Whatev. The real question was whether Heidi was going to make it to her scheduled dinner with Lauren. And the answer — come on, you knew it before Lauren ever made it home to see the note saying that Heidi had gone to a movie with Spencer. I couldn’t help myself, though; I was psyched that Lauren would be spending the evening with Mr. Normal et al. instead. I don’t think the guy will last, but I dare to dream.

What do you think? Will Lauren keep dating the regular guy? Are Heidi and Lauren through? And should Whitney quit interning entirely?