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Gossip Girl recap: The Blair War Project

Blair underestimates her new teacher and jeopardizes her dream of going to Yale, while Chuck joins forces with Lily to take on his diabolical uncle

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Blair Waldorf Leighton
The CW

Gossip Girl

TV Show
run date:
Josh Schwartz
Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Chace Crawford, Penn Badgley, Ed Westwick
Current Status:
Off Air

‘Gossip Girl’ recap: Oh, it’s on now

Attention Emmy voters: Leighton Meester deserves to be nominated for Best Actress in a Drama. This episode of Gossip Girl was definitely a chance to watch her shine, and there’s nothing like Yale to reveal her not-so-inner bitch. And nothing makes Blair more fun to watch than a worthy opponent, and last night that was the new teacher, Rachel Carr (played by Laura Breckenridge). Blair schooling this newcomer on the ways at Constance Billard was wonderfully entertaining (”Second semester seniors get a free pass, like pregnant ladies or 14-year-old Chinese gymnasts.”) But the evening was full of classic Blair lines. ”Time to shuck the corn!” ”Cancel the Nelly Yuki Project now!” There was no better moment than when Blair left the Headmistress’ office after being told that she was given detention and her Yale acceptance was put on notice. She (along with Dorota, obvs.) sauntered down the hall, preparing for war. ”I need to wait for my moment, but then I’m going Black Ops. Off the radar. No accountability. This war I’m going to win.” Brilliant. I can’t wait.

This new teacher is definitely not as innocent as she seems. Cornfields do not necessarily yield good things. If you don’t believe me, may I suggest Netflixing a little film called Children of the Corn. And I’ll bet she’s got some skeletons in those cornfields. Plus, is she going all Catherine the Cougar on us and going after Dan Humphrey? That’s certainly what it seemed like at the end of the episode. I mean she even wore a pink Western shirt, which was a clear attempt to bond with the Humphrey family’s love of cowboy wear.

College acceptance is probably one of the most stressful times in a high schoolers life. But that being said, it sure makes for a fun time on Gossip Girl. It was so sweet that her father and his boyfriend came all the way from Europe to celebrate her acceptance. I also appreciate the Gilmore Girls/Yale reference. Where were Mama Waldorf and Cyrus? Perhaps they’re still on their honeymoon?

It’s hard to tell whether or not Serena actually cares about going to Yale or not. During the entire episode she seemed so out of it and confused. I mean it’s understandable given that her boyfriend could end up her step-brother in the near future. But still. I do like that she and Dan are both realizing that the relationship just isn’t working. Also, are we really going to have all these kids going to different schools? I’m not sure I like this plan. As unrealistic as 90210 was in its college years, it was a nice transition that they all went to the same university. Dawson’s Creek didn’t work. And Gilmore Girls struggled with the whole college thing too. And, um, hello, The OC? The whole Summer/Brown situation was not good.

I’m actually surprised that Serena would give up her spot at Yale so easily for Blair, especially when Blair was being so mean. Blair completely insulted Serena by saying Yale ”had better taste” than she thought by not accepting her. That’s the moment when I would have speed dialed Yale’s office and accepted simply to spite her. Also, would Yale really send out a press release announcing a socialite’s acceptance? That felt a little ridiculous.

NEXT: Chuck’s homecoming