If you’re anything like me, when you heard there was going to be an episode dedicated to underage drinking, you probably didn’t have high expectations. In fact, my reaction was probably: “Lord, strangle me now with the ghost of ‘Home.'” The surprise? I felt like the characters on Glee thought it was corny to be lecturing everyone on underage drinking; thus, it canceled out the corniness of them lecturing everyone on underage drinking. Make sense? That’s okay; that’s why we love Glee. So let’s take a look at this episode that tackled the wet devil and gave us four fun songs by completely plastered performers.
There was an epidemic at McKinley. No, not head lice. (Though, I’m not surprised that’s immediately where Schuester’s mind went; there’s no way that curly event atop his head hasn’t acted as a breeding ground at least once.) Drinking on school grounds and public drunkenness was becoming an issue. And being a school administrator, Principal Figgins thought an Alcohol Awareness Week and an assembly would solve their problems. (Personally, those always drove me to alcohol.) Nonetheless, the episode needed a theme, this was it, and Schuester had to find a song for the kids to sing that would be in keeping with said message of a dry lifestyle.
In the cafeteria, Emma was asking all the questions we were after last week, like, Why/how is Sue coaching the glee club at the rival school? (I love Emma. She’s the crazy voice of reason.) As Sue told it, she scored her gig after the “chipper homosexual who coaches Aural Intensity had a terrify fall down the stairs,” and, she was a natural replacement because she’s a champion. Done and done. (I still don’t accept this but whatever.)
Meanwhile, Rachel lamented the difficult task of writing an original song after Finn failed to positively respond to her song about her headband. (“Wrapped right around my melon/You’re a product like Magellan.” Woah. Just…woah.) After some prompting, she decided to take advantage of the fact that her dads were away on the Rosie O’Donnell cruise and hold a house party to help her learn how to live — because apparently being given away as an infant to two gay dads by a mother who wanted to go pursue her own dreams of stardom isn’t dramatic or “life experience” enough. Ugh; teenagers.
At the party, things were as awkward as one would expect with Rachel Berry hosting, especially when she was dressed like the party was taking place in a one-room schoolhouse with special guest Michael Landon. Poor girl. As her drink tickets and rules threatened to clear the party out faster than a flatulent guest, Puck encouraged her to break open her dads’ booze cabinet to keep the party going…well, get it started. And, boy, did it start…
NEXT: Glee kids (shockingly) know how to party