We’ve got a back-to-back, double whammy dose of good Christian eatin’ tonight on GCB! In the first episodic course, “Turn the Other Cheek,” Amanda becomes the reluctant matron of honor at Carlene and Ripp’s 17th annual wedding vow renewal ceremony, while Blake tries to incept Cricket with the idea of conception (read: he wants another baby!). In “Sex is Divine,” the night’s second helping, Pastor Tudor encourages the congregation to get sexy with their partners all week long. Both are, as fully expected in week six of this divine show, respectably raucous, so let’s tackle the first first, shall we?
On the occasion of the Cockburns’ annual gala — which includes a bridal shower, bachelorette party and heavily themed reception (this year’s: Gone With the Wind) — Carlene appeared to be in her most forgiving of moods. The blushing bride-to-be-again forgives Heather and grants her membership back in the bedazzled troupe of Plastics (although Cricket isn’t keen to welcome their realtor friend back into her good graces). Carlene also forgives Amanda and allows the prodigal Vaughn and Lil’ Cockburn Luke to continue dabbling and dating. Carlene’s forgiveness is tested when Luke asks to take Amanda to the vow renewal ceremony, which Carlene simply cannot allow, unless Amanda joins the wedding party. Suddenly, Amanda is the matron of honor at Carlene’s Nuptials 17.0, and we’re on our way to GCB’s first wedding! (Or something similar to a wedding.) Thus, I think it’s wise to present: Anatomy of an Amanda Vaughn-Planned Vow Renewal.
Part One: The Bridal Shower
Sharon, disinclined to willingly let go of the matron of honor duty, unenthusiastically gives Amanda the monstrous manual that Carlene has put together to handle the festivities. The first hurdle: a bridal shower, which Amanda seemingly pulls off, despite not putting out the correct allergy labels for the assorted macarons and ladyfingers. As Amanda keeps track of the gifts and their givers for thank you note purposes (with a Sharpie and her palm, no less), she realizes after two biblical-themed statues that her own gift is perhaps not the most appropriate for this bridal shower. In fact, Carlene doesn’t even get to open the entire present before the “battery-operated remote control marital aid” whirs and buzzes across the table with lightning-fast speed. (Ladies, if you want the classiest presents this Christmas, don’t settle for anything less than shirtless fireman wrapping paper.) Carlene is embarrassed, Amanda is mortified, and Sharon is filled with glee that the first event crashed and burned.
NEXT: Good Christian Bridesmaids?