We gave it an A
Jon Snow does his inconvenient truth presentation on the disastrous effects of global cooling. This is his big moment. He’s been running around saying, “Winter is coming and it’s worse than you think!” for so long. But what if The Hound opened that crate and the wight just played dead? Like the cartoon frog that would only sing when nobody else was watching? Jon would be humiliated, and the meeting would become pointless. Thankfully, that doesn’t happen.
The wight rushes out acting all demonic and scary and goes straight for Cersei. The Mountain is pretty unimpressively useless in defending her. Jon calmly demonstrates how to kill it. Qyburn is intrigued like he’d love to have days with this down in his dungeon for some unspeakable things.
Euron actually asks a smart question: “Can they swim?” They can’t, so the man decides to go to his island, have a pint, and wait for this to all blow over (or so it seems). For once it’s good to be a Greyjoy. He notes to Daenerys if they both leave Westeros, they’ll be the only ones left alive when this is over. Leave it Euron to try to wrangle a post-apocalypse hookup with Daenerys right in front of Cersei.
Cersei offers to accept the truce until the dead are defeated — IF “Ned Stark’s son” stays neutral in the war.
Jon’s all: Uh, but I already picked a queen! Also, he’s not Ned Stark’s son, but that’s a whole other conversation. He tries to express this in the most polite and honorable-sounding way. “I cannot serve two queens,” he explains (especially how he’s serving Daenerys, nudge-nudge). But Cersei isn’t somebody who can be mollified by being let down easily: Go to hell if y’all are just going to try to kill me after this is over anyway.
So there’s no truce! Cersei storms off. That went poorly. And notice nobody was drinking the wine or eating the snacks that were left out on the little tables. Jeez, the Lannisters kill one family at a feast and everybody gets all paranoid.
Everybody is unhappy with Jon Snow. Even Daenerys is annoyed and she was the one pressuring him to bend the knee the whole season.
Tyrion: “Have you ever considered learning how to lie, just a bit?”
Jon: “When enough people make false promises, words stop meaning anything, and there are no more answers — only better and better lies…”
It was about this point when I wrote in my notes: “This episode is terrific.” Next: A storm of siblings