They say revenge is a dish best served cold, but on Faking It, revenge is best served up in the form of a non-vegan egg roll.
Vengeance is on the menu for just about everyone in this week’s episode as Lauren is channeling Pretty Little Liars, and Karma — well, she’s just trying to avoid ending up back behind bars.
We dive in with Karma ready to get her family back on track, and the first step is making a résumé for her mom. But her mom’s work history is uh — colorful. She’s optimistic, but Karma? Not so much. If Mama Ashcroft can’t get a job, Karma will just have to find a way to make a little money herself.
Over at Amy’s, Amy and Reagan are cuddled up on Amy’s bed, having spent the past four days together — which just isn’t enough for Reagan, so she suggests Amy pick up a shift as a cater waiter with her tonight. Perfect timing: Karma bursts into Amy’s room to say she needs a job ASAP. Amy — ever the problem-solver — points out that Reagan needs someone to fill in at an event. If only Reagan was as jazzed about this development as Amy.
Later that night, Shane arrives to hangout with Amy sans Reagan; he’s barely seen her these days what with Amy and her GF officially in “nesting” mode. But, Amy is eager for some space from Reagan.
Lauren appears to be having her own version of me time. Shane and Amy quickly discover she has gone full “A,” with a revenge board dedicated to public enemy no. 1 (Theo) plastered all over it. Lauren might be casually losing it, but she certainly hasn’t lost her edge.
At the event, Reagan shows Karma the catering ropes; although, she’s starting out as a “sweeper” and will be forced to spend the night picking up scraps discarded from the wealthy attendees with her bare hands. Ah, the glamour of a Skwerkel-hosted event. Oh, yeah… this is a Skwerkel event, which Reagan conveniently forgot to mention to Karma.
Skwerkel is preparing to launch a new product, and they just so happen to have the best model in town: Liam. As Liam puts on the new gadget to practice for the presentation (The Skwerkel Monocle), he tells Zita all about running into new kid Felix at Karma’s window. Liam is convinced the two of them are sleeping together, which Zita readily confirms. But Zita tries to assure him that he can still get the girl; he just has to tell her the truth about giving up art for her. “Girls eat that s— up.”
Karma spots Zita and Liam chatting, and she is pissed. How could Reagan “forget” to mention Skwerkel was behind this shindig? But it looks like Karma isn’t the only one facing down an ex tonight—Reagan’s ex (the one who left her for a guy), is slinging drinks behind the bar. Reagan waltzes right up to her ex, Charlotte, but her new BF, Todd, is there. Charlotte introduces Reagan as a “friend.” Ouch.
Karma and Liam catch up over a tray of garbage, and the two dance between trying to expose the other’s lies, while attempting to cover up their own. It’s going really well. Liam confronts Karma about shirtless new kid Felix, while Karma insists he’s just a friend. But Liam didn’t realize she had other “friends.” But if she’s allowed to have multiple buds, so can he. Zita shows up just in time to catch the tail end of the tension-filled exchange, and Liam announces they’ll be going to the bathroom to get “friendly.”
Karma is left stunned as Reagan rushes over, still seething from her confrontation with her ex. She doesn’t just have a taste for the pricey hors d’oeuvres—she’s hungry for revenge. And Karma can’t believe Liam just walked off with Zita. A side order of revenge sounds perfect. But, in order for this whole plan to work, they’ll each have to get payback on the other’s ex. Karma is game—as long as it doesn’t land her back in the Big House.
Karma keeps her prank G-rated, offering Charlotte a non-vegan egg roll, but Reagan has something very different in mind. She slips a roofie she got from Creepy Steve into Liam’s water. So, if Karma was worried about prison time, she should probably just take off now.
Zita confronts Karma and assures her that she’s 100 percent not sleeping with Liam. In fact, he loves Karma (duh). And, to really add to the guilt trip, she spills Liam’s secret that he gave up art to get her and her family out of jail. Oh boy. Luckily, Karma manages to grab the drink out of Liam’s hand before he can take a sip. But Liam’s father snatches the drink from Karma and takes a few big gulps.
It doesn’t take long for the drugs to work: Mr. Booker is slumped over in an office as the roofie has definitely kicked in. Liam puts the pieces together and realizes it must have been something in the water Karma gave him—but there’s really no time to play Sherlock, Liam. The stage is calling.
NEXT: Karma and Reagan reveal secrets [pagebreak]
With glaring lights and people in expensive suits surrounding him, Liam attempts to deliver his father’s speech via the teleprompter. Unfortunately, the nerves kick in and since reading off the teleprompter is hard (“Take dramatic pause… gaze out at audience. S—, I wasn’t supposed to read that.”), Liam decides to screw the script and go off-book. He charms the audience with a little demonstration (and those irresistible dimples), and the whole thing goes off without a hitch.
Meanwhile, Reagan confesses to Karma that while she did go overboard with the whole roofie thing; it was only because she was still angry with Charlotte. But, now, she has Amy, a girl who has it all figured out. Right.
After everyone else leaves, Karma explains the whole revenge plot to Liam and says how sorry she is. Liam wants things to get back to normal between them if she can truly forgive him. Karma really just wants to be in control (apparently Amy gave back her copy of Fifty Shades of Grey just in time). Keen on putting a little kink into their relationship, Karma ties Liam’s hands behind his back and pushes him against the desk. It’s going to be difficult to take off that jacket now that Liam has his hands tied, but she’ll find a way.
While this is going on, Shane and Amy are studying Lauren’s board and coming to the conclusion that she is 100 percent unhinged. But none of Lauren’s plots seem plausible (“Arsenic poisoning could take weeks.”) So, why doesn’t she just go to his new school’s pep rally and expose him as a narc? It’s so simple, it just might work.
Cut to Baldwin High as Amy, Shane, and Lauren try to find a way into the school’s pep rally. Amy feels the power of mint chocolate chip ice cream calling her name back at home, but Lauren is determined to sneak in. While Lauren is using her tiny hands to find a way into the school, Shane challenges Amy as to why she really wanted Karma to take that job with Reagan. Amy feels claustrophobic and needs some space from Reagan. Shane puts on his honesty cap and says she needs to keep it real with Reagan—it’s the only way their relationship will be able to survive. (Let’s remind ourselves Shane is the honesty expert here, people.)
Once inside the pep rally, Amy, Lauren, and Shane decide it’s best to blend in. Lauren and Shane look like they could be starring in the next Bring It On spin-off in their cheerleading uniforms, while Amy is forced to rock the pirate mascot costume. But, the three manage to weasel their way into the varsity cheerleaders’ routine thanks to Lauren’s “never show fear” life motto.
If only the trio were as gifted at cheerleading as they are at lying. After making their entrance, it’s announced the team will be performing their national championship winning routine, and while Amy carries herself like she took several swigs of her cousin Captain Morgan’s spiced rum, Lauren and Shane aren’t exactly embracing their inner Eliza Dushku either (minus the spirit fingers that Shane nails). It doesn’t take long for the entire team to come tumbling down, but thankfully, the basketball players are about to make their way through the crowd. It’s go-time.
Theo finally makes his entrance, and Lauren runs over to grab the microphone out of the announcer’s hands. She can’t even get the words out, but at least she has back up. Amy and Shane march up to Lauren and start to cheer, “Can I get an N-A-R-C!” (“He’s not the man he seems to be!”) Lauren looks devastated as Amy and Shane pull her away from the scene. Maybe mint chocolate chip ice cream would’ve been a better way to get rid of the betrayal blues after all.
At Amy’s, Lauren, Shane, and Amy are nursing their sore muscles and Lauren’s broken heart with a tub of ice cream as Lauren realizes now that revenge on Theo, a.k.a. Jimmy, didn’t make her feel any better. It’s just going to take time—which obviously sucks. Amy tells Shane that Reagan is on her way over, and she’s going to be honest with her feelings. But while honesty is the best policy for their relationship, Shane still doesn’t plan on telling Duke the truth about the whole TMZ thing.
Post-hookup, Karma is waiting in Amy’s room to confront her about being honest with Reagan as the two of them majorly bonded tonight. Amy needs to tell the truth about sometimes being attracted to guys—and that she had sex with Liam. If only Reagan wasn’t already at Amy’s, listening to their entire conversation outside her window.
One-liners Most Likely to Succeed:
- “I always said she could use a good dose of electroshock.” —Shane
- “And I can’t get caught with blood on my hands. Not real blood, I mean metaphorical blood because, to be clear, I’m not killing anyone.” —Karma
- “The guy’s practically a Disney prince.” —Zita