Art is almost always polarizing. But I’m not sure we can really classify lawn sculptures as art. I remember a neighbor of ours growing up had one of those wooden cutouts of a woman bending over, tending to her garden. So basically a big wooden butt. Um, that is not art. And neither is that monstrosity that Bob and Lee had installed in their front yard. As Bree put it, ”All the gay men in the world, and we get the two without good taste.” Still, the fountain turned out to be a great source of comedy, and isn’t that the important thing? So, my favorite new TV gays annoyed the entire neighborhood with their garish fountain but, most enjoyably, proved the biggest irritation for Susan. They also unwittingly relaunched the Wisteria Lane homeowners’ association. Is Desperate Housewives finally getting the hang of adding new characters? It’s taken a while (I’m still trying to forget the whole Alfre Woodard debacle), but this season Marc Cherry & Co. are really proving to be skillful with these introductions. This is especially impressive given the trend of annoying new characters on other network series. (Hello, Heroes!)
Speaking of new characters, I think the most enjoyable plotline this episode has got to be Katherine and Lynette’s battle for the homeowners’ association presidency. I loved when Bob and Lee came to Lynette and compared Katherine to the Nazis. Hilariously inappropriate. Lynette’s (and Felicity Huffman’s) best moments are typically when Lynette’s competitive side comes out, so this was a great idea. And her scene in the tree house with her kids was moving. The final vote came down to a tie that Susan had to break, and sadly, she sided with Katherine. Susan and Lynette made up, though, in an awfully touching scene in which Lynette pleaded with Susan to defend her tree house, which was her children’s only refuge from Lynette’s illness. ”It feels like I’ve ruined their childhood,” she said. And that’s when I started crying. But Katherine ended up letting the tree house stay up after her husband scolded her for not making friends with any of the neighbors. She was less friendly with Bob and Lee, but it turns out they had a trump card: Bob’s ex had been on the board of the hospital where Adam had worked in Chicago. Given the look on Katherine’s face as she walked away, Adam had done something quite scandalous, evidently a result of his wandering eye. Delany’s reaction to Bob and Lee’s blackmail was amazing. It was the perfect mix of anger and surrender.
Gaby and Carlos continued their clandestine meetings but this time decided to make a weekend out of it. The only problem? Victor apparently had put a tail on Gaby, who managed to elude the detective by dressing like one of her little gardeners. Eva Longoria is without a doubt overexposed in the press, but the lady has got wonderful, underrated comic chops. It’s a shame she’s never been nominated for an Emmy. But anyway, Gaby ended up running into another gardener at the hotel, her onetime paramour John (Jesse Metcalfe). All I’ve got to say is homeboy is lookin’ a little dirty. But the dude has gotten married to a hotel heiress and is expecting a little John Jr. Anyway, John showed up and interrupted Gaby and Carlos’ wild night. Again, more than anything else, the sequence showed off Longoria’s great comic timing. I loved when she got all excited for her cheese fries. I have a similar reaction to gravy fries. And Carlos calling the very well-manicured John a ”wax job” was fantastic. Gaby and Carlos finally decided to end all the sneaking around and just break up with Victor and Edie. All I could think was, hello, did you forget about Victor’s little violent streak? I’m not breaking up with him will be safe. Still, Carlos and Gaby said goodbye with a huge, lasting smooch right in front of Gaby’s big picture window. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. The detective, who they thought was Victor’s, was actually hired by Edie, who is also someone you don’t want to get angry.
NEXT: The battle for Danielle’s baby