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Bones recap: The Fight in the Fixer

It’s a scandal at the Jeffersonian

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Patrick McElhenney/FOX

Bones

type:
TV Show
genre:
Drama, Crime
run date:
09/03/08
performer:
David Boreanaz, Emily Deschanel
broadcaster:
Fox
seasons:
12
Current Status:
In Season
tvpgr:
TV-14

Bones is wearing the white hat tonight. The victim of the hour is a high-powered fixer in the style of Scandal’s Olivia Pope, and while this episode is tragically light on oversize pea coats, it does boast a guy who’s been dyed purple. It’s got that handled. Also handled? Murky morality, affairs, fathers doing objectionable things, child forgers, men trying to buy women’s affections, and lots of blackmail. Shonda, show yourself.

But if Frank Kwietowski is our Olivia, he’s more chair-bashing Murder Olivia than Gladiator Olivia. An intimidating man known for making his clients’ problems disappear, Frank did extensive work with Aubrey’s father back in the day, which works to our team’s advantage. Aubrey was a snoopy kid. He knows this office inside and out, right down to the hidden file room behind the bathroom. On the one hand, genius move: No one’s going to go crawling around under the toilet looking for switches to flick. On the other hand, Aubrey apparently did that.

Frank’s face shows signs of being hit with something made out of wood, and his left leg looks to have been shattered a year ago. The most likely culprit is Jimmy Nasari, a low-level mobster and nightclub owner known for breaking people’s legs with bats. Frank’s work with Nasari’s soon-to-be ex-wife cost the mobster $12 million. Nasari doesn’t deny breaking Frank’s leg, and he had motive to finish the job; he claims that Frank retaliated by ruining his life. But his story is tame compared to what the rest of our suspects have to offer.

Billionaire CEO Abraham Froome (new band name; I call it) hired Frank to retrieve a blackmail sex tape and complementary images featuring Froome in a series of compromising positions. And a diaper. Cam likes it — maybe a little too much. “Fetishes are my fetish,” she shrugs, unapologetic. It’s too bad she doesn’t get to join Booth and Brennan as they track down the hotel employee who hasn’t shown up for work in a week; bellboy Valon opens the door dyed purple head to toe. I’d bet (not money!) that Cam found an excuse to stop by the FBI during that interrogation.

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Valon defends his blackmail on the grounds that Froome was a bad tipper and swears that he didn’t kill the guy. Frank robbed Valon, right down to the blackmail tape, and forced him at gunpoint into a bathtub full of purple dye. Then he lied to Froome, telling him that the blackmailer was crazy and he’d better pay up. He sold the story with self-inflicted bruises and pocketed the $2 million for himself. In this case, that pocket was a safety deposit box — purchased by his loyal employee, Kerry.

NEXT: Notes on a report card

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