I’m sorry everyone, but this won’t be your usual Biggest Loser TV Watch. My sarcasm button is broken today. After all the honest, sincere moments we saw packed into last night’s show, I really don’t think there’s anything I can make fun of. Seriously. This episode embodied everything we watch BL for — amazing transformations, people performing unbelievable feats of fitness they didn’t think they would ever be capable of, and people changing their habits to maintain healthier lifestyles.
See? Not funny. Just true. If you absolutely must be amused while reading, try running this text through a Pirate or a Pig Latin translator. Otherwise, bear with me for the next two pages and then weigh in on the message boards (pun totally unintended but now that I see it, pretend it was totally intended).
Hands down, this has been my favorite episode of the season so far. We saw the contestants complete a half-marathon, realize they could translate their new healthy habits to their lives at home without slipping back into their unhealthy ways, and swell with pride as their families freaked out over their weight loss. For the first time in a while, I have no complaints.
The episode began in the elimination room right after Mandi left. The black team joined the remaining blues for yet another new twist: Someone else would be going home too. NOT! Fine, Ms. Alison Sweeney, you got me this time. I really did think someone else was going home. Until you were all like ”J.K., you’re all going home because it’s Christmas because it’s St. Patrick’s Day just because!”
The trip home marked the first time many of the contestants had seen their families in more than two months, and it was the first time their families would see their smaller bodies. It was emotional watching all the reunions, but none more so than Mike and Ron reuniting with their brother/son, who is the same size the two were when they arrived at the ranch. Seeing his family members so much thinner left the poor kid conflicted — half of him was proud of their success, and I’m sure the other half was jealous and lonely that he’s the biggest guy left. Hopefully he was motivated to prove to himself that if they can do it, so can he. Good luck, junior brown team member!
My other favorite reunions were Tara’s, simply because she looked smokin’ hot and drastically different than she did in the first week (I had to pause on the split screen of the weigh-ins because I thought they might’ve used a shot of Laura by mistake), and Sione’s because he has the most adorable daughter with the most adorable tiny light pink glasses that are so effing endearing I can’t even handle it. I just wanted to hug her forever. Seriously. They should make her likeness into a doll. Cutest child ever.
God, that was great. I didn’t even need to watch the rest of the show — those few minutes were so satisfying (Tears! Hugs! Split screens!) that they could’ve ended the episode right there and I would’ve gone home knowing I got my money’s worth. You know — if I weren’t already in my pajamas in bed, and if I had paid money (besides my cable bill) to watch it.
NEXT: The contestants deal with temptations, and we’re not talking about the ”My Girl” singers