”Take care of yourself. You’re in here with a bunch of monsters.” —Joshuah, Big Brother 9
Actually, Mr. Advertising Media Buyer from Dallas, Texas, I can’t think of anyone more monstrous on this season than you. And you couldn’t have been more wrong, anyway. The second he walked out the door last week, I marveled at how pitch-perfect the evictions have been so far and how we could be winding down to a satisfying finale (lest any of you are feeling confused by that quote from last week’s evictee, it was revealed in Sunday’s episode). With the possible exception of Sharon (who’s nice and all, but hard to tolerate given her screechy voice), I wouldn’t begrudge any of these people the cash…at least for right now.
Sure, these final five players are hardly relatable, but everyone’s been dependable when it comes to providing fairly decent entertainment — though moving forward, I have to wonder if any member of Team Christ will be able to top James’ over-the-top eruption on Sunday. It was a shock watching James wring out those crocodile tears — not so much because he earned his crybaby moment (he’d hardly be bawling if his alliance had been winning), but how it ended up exposing Adam to be one helluva softie. I haven’t forgotten his ”retard” comment from earlier this season, but damn if Adam hasn’t turned into a downright cuddle bug, something that Sheila and Nat are using to their fullest advantage.
Let’s go to the tape: After winning HOH last Wednesday, Adam appeared to have Team Christ’s best interests at heart by targeting James for eviction — until Captain Pink Hair began whimpering about ”feeling isolated,” which prompted the unsuspecting Adam to rethink his opinion of James. Faster than you can say ”I got you, sucka,” James and Adam hugged it out and immediately set their sights on Sheila, whom Adam described as ”the odd man out,” if not the unwitting victim of their endless household pranks (pretty harsh of James to cover her in flour, though). While Adam’s teammate, Ryan, was off making secret pacts with Sharon to be ”the two nicest people in the final two,” Adam got busy concocting a provocative, albeit cowardly scheme: He’ll nominate Sheila instead of James and challenge his alliance to compete for the Golden Veto if they want their nemesis out. Will James survive again?
I could practically hear what many of you were yelling at the screen: The producers managed to interfere again to save a fan favorite! But I refuse to believe that happened, primarily because (a) I believe exec producer Allison Grodner each year (maybe foolishly) when she says she doesn’t tinker with the game, and (b) James’ anguish — however juvenile and naïve it was — had a genuine effect on Adam, who clearly wanted nothing more than to make things better. Too bad he regretted the decision the minute he made it, so Adam immediately sought forgiveness from his alliance and, by God, he got it — thereby returning James to the place where he belonged: alone, again. Naturally.
NEXT: James’ last hurrah