Remember that time Jenna and Matty were like, “OMG, THIS IS THE BEST PRANK EVER” when they discovered the hallways were filled with bubbles? Remember how that was more like a themed dance party than an actual prank? Well, they have to clean up after said prank in this week’s episode, proving even further that if we are going to call it a prank, it was more on themselves than anyone else.
Putting the definition of “prank” aside, Jenna is trying to do damage control in the wake of Jake and Matty’s dust-up. She still feels bad about not telling Matty that Jake slept with Gabby, which isn’t completely rational: Like, girl, Matty would still be totally pissed off at Jake even if you told him earlier that day. Stop beating yourself up over it.
In the process of beating herself up over it though, she decides to try to have a little fun and tosses a bucket of water on Jake mid-clean. Matty tells her not to, but Jenna’s all, “Woo, this will definitely squash any tension!” and does it anyway… and the water hits the breaker box, causing the school’s power to go out.
This ends up working in everyone’s favor though, because school is subsequently canceled. Once Val delivers the good news, the entire study body begins fist-bumping and chanting Jenna’s name, and, if we’re going to be honest, it’s a bit creepy. No one actually chants in unison in real life unless they’re at a protest or something. Jenna milks the moment and declares, “Black-out party at the beach, bitches!”
Sadie, though, isn’t joining in on the festivities, because she’s too busy reuniting with her just-returned mother — or, as she likes to call her, Darlene. The reunion isn’t going so well, mostly because Darlene used to make Sadie feel bad about her body and that’s not something you just brush under the rug.
Darlene insists she’s a changed woman now, full of positivity and zen, but Sadie’s not buying it. They go to a diner, where Sadie orders pancakes with bacon and Darlene orders tomatoes with cottage cheese, and then to a car dealership, where Sadie makes it clear that Darlene cannot buy her love. They eventually have a somewhat productive conversation about how Sadie still holds a grudge and how Darlene is trying to be a better mother, and it’s about as sweet as a Sadie interaction can get.
NEXT: Jenna and T hunt for libations. [pagebreak]
While Sadie’s sorting out her mother-daughter drama, Jenna and T are trying to acquire some alcohol. Their plan to take from Jenna’s parents is foiled when they come home to discover Val has temporarily moved in and is using their liquor to try out different cocktails. Classic Val.
Plan B is the grocery store, where their basket holds a mixture of vodka and paper towels. That plan, unsurprisingly, also falls through: Jenna tries to chat up the cashier about dropping the kids off at daycare and using her free time to stock up on booze — and then ends up being escorted out of the store by a police officer.
That brings us to Plan C: asking random passersby to go in and buy it for them. Jenna tries to seduce one man into doing it, but he’s more freaked out than turned on. Then her mom — otherwise known as the World’s Chillest Parent — passes by (she has to re-stock their own liquor cabinet before Dad gets home) and offers to buy for them.
Although ultimately successful, all of these failed attempts to secure vodka means Jenna and T missed the entire beach bash. But that’s probably for the best: Jake tried to apologize to a very, very wasted Matty, and it didn’t go so well.
“You’re not me and you never will be,” Matty slurs to Jake, “no matter however many of my girlfriends you get sloppy seconds on.” Oh, okay, that’s cool Matty, just treat your ex-girlfriends like old button-down shirts you handed off to your little brother once you outgrew them. Ex-girlfriends are not old shirts, Matty! They are humans! Shame, shame, shame.
Jenna shows up just as the party’s breaking up, and offers to take a stumbling Matty home. Once they get to his room, he kinda hits on her by saying he would ask her to stay over but he’s about to puke everywhere and “that’s not very sexy.” He might be acting like an asshole, but he gets extra points for warning Jenna that he’s about to blow.
After putting him to bed, Jenna has this look of something on her face. It’s hard to tell what exactly — does she pity him? Is she thinking, “Man, I wish he wasn’t about to vom everywhere so I can squeeze in a hook-up?” Is she just worried and being a good friend?
Things are more clear with Val, who left notes for Jenna’s mom and Biggie bidding them adieu. “I have to experience life,” she writes in her goodbye card to Biggie. “I have to see the world.” This big news isn’t that surprising given Lacey basically encouraged (a very drunk) Val to ditch everything and embrace her youth earlier, but it is a little disappointing. Val is one of the most amusing characters on this show — one chock-full of amusing characters — so hopefully she hasn’t strayed too far from home.
Most awkward Awkward moment of the week: When a clearly hurting, clearly inebriated Matty embarrasses himself by responding to Jake’s apology with, “I’m Matty f–king McKibben!” Cringing. Cannot stop cringing.