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The Amazing Race recap: Don't Cry for Them, Argentina

Posted on

Amazing
Monty Brinton/CBS

The Amazing Race

type:
TV Show
genre:
Reality TV
run date:
03/08/01
performer:
Phil Keoghan
Producer:
Jerry Bruckheimer
broadcaster:
CBS
seasons:
29
Current Status:
In Season

Oh, my gravy, this race just got interesting. Last week I thought Jet and Cord got lucky by landing on the fastest bus, but to run such a clean race two weeks in a row? Is this a fluke or have we met the team to beat?

And has the team to beat turned into the most likable (albeit with slightly garish belt buckles) pair of globetrotters since, well, last season’s Globetrotters? They know who they are, don’t have a tolerance for bitchy Brandy comments yet aren’t rude to her, and damn, can Jet throw a lasso. (On the second try. That’s right, buddy. You’re not getting off scot-free.)

Or is the team to beat Steve and Allie? Wait, who are they again? Clearly, Berty V-M doesn’t want us to know since he’s shown us the absolute minimum footage possible for these two to still qualify as contestants. Let’s see what we know: Steve sometimes falls. Steve sometimes aches because he’s 57. Steve doesn’t have a fear of lice as evidenced by his willingness to hat swap at the pit stop mat. (Did he skip grade school where teachers ban you from sharing headgear with your friends?) But other than that and despite their impressive finish (more on that later), I have no idea who these people are. I know about Jeff’s plans for procreating, for crying out loud. Either Steve and Allie are the most boring team on the planet or some editor should be canned.

This week’s leg basically starts with everyone leaving Chile. It was difficult to see that beautiful footage of such an exquisite country knowing about the earthquake that just happened. If you have the means, do what you can to help out for the earthquake relief. Part of loving travel — and I assume loving Amazing Race is more than watching a reality show about teams clawing, uniting, and bickering their way toward a finish line — is doing our part to ensure that our planet is not destroyed, whether by acts of nature or people. And now I’ll stop preaching.

Anyway, all teams have to board one of two Argentina-bound buses that leave the following morning. Even playing field. Well, except for Caite, who misses her departure time because she’s puking and shaking in the hotel bathroom. Why she and Brent, who’s also under the weather but not quite bowing before the porcelain god, decide to go to the emergency room in the middle of the night is beyond me. If they knew they were sick or dehydrated, might they have opted for a 9pm visit instead of missing their departure time? Regardless, I feel for them. It can’t be easy getting sick when you need all your strength and mental clarity. Plus, to abandon all vanity by letting cameras monitor you in the emergency room getting an IV! Wait. What’s that? Yes, Caite is wearing multiple coats of mascara on the Chilean ER gurney. Hey, puking on national TV is one thing, while showing America your bare eyelashes is an indignity few could tolerate. In the end, they’re a little more than three hours behind schedule, though hydrated and properly made-up.

NEXT: The cowboys rope in the challenge