Resolutions abounded on Desperate Housewives last night. And even though we’re less than two weeks into a new year (not that you’d be able to tell on Desperate Housewives, which seems to ignore the holidays), I’m not talking the kicking-bad-habits resolutions that are so popular during the early weeks of January. No, we’re talking resolutions as in the end of conflict.
In last night’s rather lackluster episode, a lot of long-standing problems came to a close: Edie and Dave made up and he moved back in; Lynette and her mom finally made peace and Porter’s case was dropped; Susan and Edie made nice after being locked in a basement together for what seemed like hours; Bree fought with — and then made-up with — her future son-in-law Alex; Katherine and Mike had a mini-fight before deciding to commit even further; and Carlos and Gaby even resolved the discipline problems they were having with their little rug rats, Juanita and Celia. With all that resolution, my question is: What do we possibly have to look forward to for next week? Everything seems wrapped up! Except for that whole continually creepy Dave Williams business. The writers are gonna have to cook up some brand new problems to keep us viewers happy.
All of that said, some of the resolutions were good and some were, um, just weird. For instance, the resolution to Porter’s court case and disappearance felt like a letdown. Really? After weeks of build-up — cougar Anne Schilling! the death threat from Mr. Schilling! Porter’s disappearance! the twin switch! — the whole, twisted court case felt totally brushed off: ”I just came by to tell you that the judge threw out Porter’s case for lack of evidence,” Lynette told her cranky mom, Stella. That’s all? Obviously, Porter was innocent, but I thought maybe we’d at least see some court time or something — or some repercussions of some sort? It felt like all of that was for nothing. At the same time, I guess Lynette probably couldn’t have really handled any more stress — there were several times in the last few episodes where I thought she was living on the edge of Crazyville, just about to be elected mayor for all eternity.
However, despite the abrupt end of the Porter story line, a couple parts of Lynette’s story were intriguing. First, her continued cunningness. With the way the show was cut, I was convinced that Lynette had been in a car wreck when we heard the crashing sounds during Tom’s phone call. Natch, they’d never kill off Lynette — or even hurt her majorly, probably — but I thought her tactic for getting Porter to come to the hospital, while cruel, was so clever. Put one in the ”win” column for Lynette.
NEXT: Edie and Susan take it to the basement