Douglas Gorenstein/Getty Images; Little, Brown and Company
Isabella Biedenharn
May 10, 2017 AT 11:41 AM EDT

Each week leading up to the publication of David Sedaris’s Theft By Findinga collection of the writer’s humorous diary entries from 1977 to 2002, EW is revealing one exclusive clip from the audiobook — which, of course, Sedaris reads himself.

Today’s clip features diary entires from October 1998: In one, Sedaris’s longtime partner Hugh cuts off the tip of his finger and Sedaris frantically realizes he doesn’t know how to say “band-aid” in French. In the other, Sedaris’s sister Amy tries to convince him to buy a miniature potbelly pig, and can’t fathom why he isn’t interested.

Listen to the clip below. Theft By Finding is available in print and audio formats on May 30.

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