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Brooklyn Nine-Nine season 3 premiere recap: 'New Captain'

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John P Fleenor

This post contains details from the Brooklyn Nine-Nine premiere that aired Sept. 27.

Say hello to your new captain, Brooklyn Nine-Nine fans, and give a salute to the show’s new season.

Sunday’s premiere picks up in the exact spot where we left our favorite detectives — waiting at the elevator to meet their new boss. His name is Seth Dozerman (guest star Bill Hader) and he’s a nose-to-the-grindstone workaholic perfectionist… meaning, he’s basically the Nine-Nine’s worst nightmare. He loves numbers, has no use for people, and would be content to work himself to death — which, incidentally, is what happens by the end of the episode. RIP, Dozerman. We’ll always have your Dozer-pads to yell at us for not working fast enough.

Just what killed B99’s boss was walking in on Jake Peralta (Andy Samberg) and Amy Santiago (Melissa Fumero) making out in the evidence locker (His final words? “Tell my wife I love her… work ethic.”). The show seems committed to moving forward with their relationship after the pair’s “for reals” kiss at the end of last season. At first, they agree to keep things “light and breezy” and set ground rules like not telling anyone at work, not using boyfriend-girlfriend labels, and not having sex right away. An awkward official first date leads to breaking Rule No. 3, and after accidentally killing Dozerman, they come clean to everyone but decide to just stay colleagues, but that decision is short-lived — as Boyle (Joe Lo Truglio) puts it in a pep talk with Jake: Being “light and breezy” is for linen suits, not for relationships with people you care about.

So by episode’s end they’re together again and it’s apparently not light or breezy. Hopefully B99 intends to keep their relationship going for at least the immediate future — keeping these two on and off would be bad for the precinct and frustrating for fans.

And Hader’s short guest-star tenure means the Nine-Nine needs another new captain. If you thought Holt (Andre Braugher) could make a return, you’re out of luck (at least, for now). Their newest boss is… The Vulture (a.k.a. Detective Pembroke, a.k.a. Dean Winters) from back in season 1. That should make things interesting around the office, and not just because he greets his underlings by calling them “ding-dongs.”

Speaking of Holt, he and Gina (Chelsea Peretti) got screen time over at his new NYPD Public Relations post, where he has eight-point plans and big ideas for community engagement but Wuntch (Kyra Sedgwick) says he can’t start anything until they finish the work already in progress — like naming the NYPD’s new pigeon mascot (they settle on Paulie, though Pepper really is the best option). He knows he can do good work there, but Wuntch won’t let him. As Gina puts it, “This man is a Timberlake and you need to stop treating him like a Fatone.”

There was one other nice scene between Gina and Holt, where she says she followed him to PR because he makes things better (and because she thought it would help launch her reality show Linetti, Set, Go — not to be confused with her fragrance line, Gina in a Bottle). Turns out, these two make a nice team, and not just when Holt is wearing the Paulie the Pigeon costume in an elementary school.

What did you think of the season premiere? Are you glad Amy and Jake are making a go of it? And do you want to hear the wedding speech Boyle already has written for them?

Brooklyn Nine-Nine airs Sundays at 8:30 p.m. ET on Fox.