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An open letter to the 'Happy Endings' bosses

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Craig Sjodin/ABC

Dear Happy Endings producers,

Among all the great news that has come out lately—Marvel finally snagged Spider-Man! Agent Dale Cooper will have a damn fine cup of coffee on the Twin Peaks reboot!—the thought that Happy Endings might actually be resurrected is probably the most ah-mah-zing thing I’ve heard in a long time.

For the last several days, you have toyed with our emotions by teasing the return of this short-lived comedy, which couldn’t find its footing on ABC as the network shuttled it around to different nights before killing it altogether. You’ve hinted at a potential—and seemingly magical—fourth season with various tweets, from a Four Seasons video to a countdown that promises, “It’s almost a new day.”

In an era when Netflix, Yahoo and Hulu keep picking up dead shows, it seems all the more plausible that this could legitimately happen. Offering up more hope is the fact that Damon Wayans Jr. is leaving New Girl, Adam Pally just exited The Mindy Project, and Eliza Coupe’s USA comedy Benched recently got the ax. With Casey Wilson’s Marry Me struggling in the ratings, and Zachary Knighton and Elisha Cuthbert’s new midseason comedies—Fox’s Weird Loners and NBC’s One Big Happy, respectively—likely meeting the same fate, it seems all but assured that the cast will be free to reunite and make our dreams come true. High five for timing, right?

There’s just one problem, you clever little Happy Endings writers: That countdown is a sham, isn’t it? It roughly ends on April Fool’s Day… which means this could be the sickest joke in the history of television.

If it’s true that you’re pulling a long con, you will lose the goodwill we Happy Endings fans still hold in our hearts. You should be ashamed of yourselves for pulling a prank worse than that time the gang made Max think he won the lotto.

So, here’s your one chance to fix things: Actually bring Happy Endings back to life, and we’ll call it even, K?