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Jason Jones and Samantha Bee fight over hosting 'The Daily Show'

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The Daily Show
Comedy Central

Jon Stewart called in sick last night, opening the door for Jason Jones to host The Daily Show. It’s his turn. With John Oliver gone to HBO, Jones is the heir apparent. Just don’t say that to Samantha Bee, his wife.

“Obviously, I am not Jon Stewart,” Jones said. “Jon is out sick tonight with a bad case of something called the bubons. I’m not sure I’m pronouncing that [correctly]… the bubons. It’s apparently an illness that effects only people from New Jersey.”

Fortunately, Jones had lots of help from a late-night host’s best friend, Vice President Joe Biden, who was in the news for a recent rash of foot-in-mouth disease. “I like Joe. He speaks his mind,” said Jones. “But being second in command is a bitchy job. Never getting to sit in the captain’s chair. Waiting for something to happen to the boss’s health before you get your chance to do anything. And you know you’re ready. That has got to be, I would imagine, incredibly frustrating.”

The show seemed whipped together at the last minute. Bill O’Reilly was supposed to be the guest, but either he also has a case of the bubons or decided to postpone his appearance until his friemesis Stewart can return. Instead, former Daily Show correspondent Wyatt Cenac came by to promote his new comedy album.

Jones also had to deal with Bee, the Daily Show‘s Senior My Wife Correspondent, who arrived in the second segment to challenge her husband’s promotion. “I should be in that chair!” she said, before handcuffing herself to the desk. “I was going to grab the brass ring today. Anyway, whatever.”

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