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Sound Bites: January 24, 2014

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“All right, all right, all right.” —Matthew McConaughey, accepting his Golden Globe

“It’s like what Sir Ian McKellen said to me the day I sold my boat to Karl Lagerfeld: Parting is such sweet sorrow.” —Ingrid de Forest (Kristen Bell), after taking Leslie’s (Amy Poehler) city-council seat, on Parks and Recreation

“That’s not a kid. That’s a soldier. That’s death.” —Matt Axelson (Ben Foster), debating with his fellow SEALs about what to do with a captured goatherd, in Lone Survivor

“The highest bidder gets every single one of my guns.” —Sean Penn, auctioning a sculpture made with his firearms, at the Help Haiti Home benefit

Gravity is nominated for best film. It’s the story of how George Clooney would rather float away into space and die than spend one more minute with a woman his own age.” —Cohost Tina Fey at the Golden Globes

“I love my @ELLEmagazine cover. It made me feel glamorous & cool. And if anyone wants to see more of my body, go on thirteen dates with me.” —Mindy Kaling, on the controversy over her Elle cover, via Twitter

“‘Dying is easy; comedy is hard.’ I believe it was Shia LaBeouf who said that.” —Golden Globes presenter Jim Carrey

“Adam was there for you when you went totally bats— insane and, like, decided to cut your hair like a little boy on a fancy cookie box.” —Shoshanna (Zosia Mamet), defending Hannah’s (Lena Dunham) boyfriend, on Girls

Masters of Sex is the degree I got from Boston College.” —Cohost Amy Poehler at the Golden Globes