After two years of terrible waiting, Americans can rest easy: There is finally a new Fast & Furious movie. It’s called Fast & Furious 6, but we’re all just going to call it Fast Six, although a more accurate title based on the Super Bowl trailer would be Tank Fast Plane Furious: Resurrection. (UPDATE: Check out our deep dive into the Fast & Furious 6 trailer here.) In a clear homage to Alfred Hitchcock’s To Catch a Thief, Vin Diesel and his glistening biceps are brought out of retirement by The Rock and his glistening biceps, because The Rock needs to track down a highly effective criminal paramilitary European road gang.
The whole crew from Fast Five reunites — including Han, who actually died three movies ago, but that only matters if you assume that the Fast & Furious franchise has to obey the physical laws of nature. Also, Ludacris says “They have a tank!” and there’s an airplane crash and Gina Carano hangs out in the background, indicating that this whole thing might be a stealth spinoff to Haywire. Plus, dancing women. In conclusion, Michelle Rodriguez. I rest my case. My nose is bleeding. My eyes are raining. Bask in the trailer below:
If you’re keeping track, the Fast franchise has now taken place in four continents. Start getting excited for Fast 8, which will feature a car chase across a melting glacier in Antarctica, and Fast 9, which will feature a car chase across the (exploding) Sydney Opera House. And then Fast X will be set in space, probably.
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