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Soundbites: July 13, 2012

Memorable lines from ”True Blood,” ”Web Therapy,” and more

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”I wouldn’t go up to Professor Stephen Hawking and go, ‘Hey, do you want to see me moonwalk?”’ —Russell Brand, while denying rumors that he boasted about his sex life to the Dalai Lama, who is celibate, on BrandX With Russell Brand

”I think the whole world hates me, but they can just go bite me…those who haven’t already.” —Sookie (Anna Paquin) on True Blood

”For the first time ever, Saudi Arabia is going to allow women to compete in the Summer Olympics. The rumor is that Saudi women are excellent runners — because they’re not allowed to drive.” —Conan O’Brien on Conan

”I wasn’t raised in the Catholic Church, although I wish I had been as a child — you know, those wafers looked delicious.” —Fiona (Lisa Kudrow), after a book publisher (Rosie O’Donnell) asks her if she belongs to a parish, on Web Therapy