Well, I just lost my afternoon. In honor of Paramount’s 100th anniversary, Vanity Fair has “assembled 116 of the greatest talents ever to work at the studio.” That means Leo, Bob, and Marty, some icons of the studio’s golden age (hello, Eva Marie Saint, Jerry Lewis, and Michael York!), almost the entire casts of Transformers and Star Trek, and even that Canadian whippersnapper Justin Bieber, whom you might remember from a little indie film called Never Say Never. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg (Titanic zing, hey-yo!).
Because Vanity Fair knows you want to see every one of those 116 faces up close and personal, they’ve installed a zoom function on their site. Fair warning, PopWatchers: This thing is addictive. Click through at your own risk. Below, we scope out a few of the famous faces and hand out our portrait honors.
Most Consistent Facial Expression
Robert De Niro (How does he always look exactly the same? Acting!)
Blue Steel, Eat Your Heart Out
The “No Party Is Complete” Award
Most Baffling That He Continues to Play Other Characters When He Is Smoking Hot
Sacha Baron Cohen
Sisters Are Doin’ It for Themselves (and Paramount)
Dakota and Elle Fanning
A Face That Says, “I Dare You to Love Me”
A Face That Says, “I’ve Won Three Oscars, B—-“
Meryl Streep and Jack Nicholson
Still Sending Teen Hearts Aflutter
Molly Ringwald and Jon Cryer (Andie and Ducky from Pretty in Pink)
John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John (Sandy and Danny from Grease)
Best Unnecessary Accessory
Best “Look Ma, One Hand!”
Abe Vigoda Honorarium for Still-Alive (and Adorable) Old Coots
Ernest Borgnine (95) and Mickey Rooney (91)
Those are just a few of the highlights, movie fans. I’m sure there are other ones that caught your eye. Share your faves in the comments below!