Since April Fools’ Day fell on a Sunday this year, a lot of the pranks, jokes, gags and gotchas are bleeding over into today, colloquially known as “April Shame on Me Day.” But I dare you to find any April Fools’ leftover better than the “hacked” videos from Charlize Theron’s cell phone, courtesy of Funny or Die. Turns out, beyond Theron’s desire to take home another Oscar for her lethally great performance in last year’s Young Adult, the South African native has some surprising ways of spending her downtime. I mean, who knew hot milk had such novel uses in S&M bondage sex play?
Needless to say, the videos are NSFW, and you will be checking them all out below regardless:
CHARLIZE THERON GETS HACKED — Setting the stage
CHARLIZE THERON: SITTIN’ ON THA TOILET — Catchy!
CHARLIZE THERON: PRACTICING OSCAR ACCEPTANCE SPEECH — She was pretty killer in Young Adult
CHARLIZE THERON: TALKS IN HER SLEEP — What is she doing to Seacrest in that dream?
CHARLIZE THERON: ASPCA SPOKESPERSON AUDITION TAPE — Sarah McLachlan can suck it
CHARLIZE THERON: STALKING SOME DUDE — “Ima kill you with my sex!”
CHARLIZE THERON: KINKY SEX TAPE — Not for the faint of heart
CHARLIZE THERON: THE “OFFICIAL” “RESPONSE”
Between these clips and her two high profile roles in Snow White and the Huntsman and Prometheus this summer, I’d say we’re approaching the apogee of Charlize, whatever that means. So which video was your favorite?