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If Britney Spears became a judge on 'The X Factor,' would you watch it?

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Britney Spears
Danny Martindale/Getty Images

If an empty vessel fell in an empty room, would anyone hear it? Simon Cowell is counting on you to answer YES!

My first reaction to the news that Britney Spears is reportedly nearing final negotiations to be a judge on The X Factor was “Yikes.” But after I thought about it for a few seconds — Simon controlling my mind from afar — I was like “YES.” It’d be Britney vs. Xtina all over again!

This could be a real Crossroads for her. I’ve been wanting to revisit the halcyon days of 2002 since at least 2005.

Granted, Britney on The X Factor would probably play out nothing like Christina Aguilera on The Voice. Christina pretty much sets the tone of judges’ row on that show with a bold, calculated but ultimately harmless (it is reality TV after all) bitchiness. She says whatever she wants, instigates fights, wears fascinating “hats.” She’s an actress on that show, playing her part perfectly. Britney — love her to death but I’m honestly not sure if she’s capable of independent thought! — would sit pretty next to Simon, wait for him to direct the flow, and squeak out rote approvals of the performances. I’m not sure they’d even need her to do much else.

Britney certainly knows what it means, and what it takes, to be packaged into a hugely successful pop star — which is blatantly, if not crudely, what The X Factor is all about. I’ve never known her to be well-spoken about her craft, the industry, or really anything except the phenomenon of her knees looking like boobs. (I admit, that blew my mind.) But does she have to? It’s Britney, bitch! You’re lucky she showed up!

I mean, she’ll be sitting where Nicole Scherzinger used to be. No one is expecting brilliance here. The sheer “will she or won’t she…” (crash and burn?) (shave head on camera?) (spout wisdom out of nowhere?) mystery would definitely get me to tune in to The X Factor if I wasn’t committed to it already. What about you?

Read more:

Reports: Britney Spears nearing deal for ‘X Factor’

Today is the 10th anniversary of Britney Spears’ film ‘Crossroads’

Britney at 30: a milestone birthday for a star who’s had plenty of milestones

Ask Annie anything about ‘The X Factor’ (or whatever) in the video player below. To see her answers to previous questions, click on the text links below the picture.