Considering it’s been an ongoing plotline on American Horror Story that the unhappy Harmon family couldn’t sell their home (a.k.a. “Murder House”) if their lives depended on it — and, yes, those are actually the stakes — will the real-life abode featured on Ryan Murphy’s latest show fare any better? The 15,000-square-foot house, located in L.A.’s Country Club Park, recently hit the market.
Some of the highlights:
- Six bedrooms for making demon babies and losing your afterlife virginity
- Five spacious bathrooms where mistresses can luxuriate and psychopaths can murder nurses
- A Halloween party-ready grand ballroom — just be careful when bobbing for apples!
- Tiffany stained glass windows to stylishly shield homeowners from nosy neighbors and leering, disfigured men
- Six vintage-tile fireplaces with accompanying pokers (gently used)
- A formal dining room, ideal for indulging in your hankering for raw brains
- A large solarium in case the fertile soil in the background isn’t enough to satisfy your green thumb
The house is available for a mere $4.5 million. (We’re assuming the jars of fetuses and sundries in the basement aren’t included in the asking price.)
What do you think, PopWatchers? Would you live in Murder House?