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Hit List: Dec. 9, 2011

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Rocky musical to debut in Germany next fall: ”At the end of the day, Rocky is a love story,” says Sylvester Stallone
”Some love story!” sniffed a side of beef hanging in a Philly meat locker. ”He’s pretty abusive, if you ask me.”

Tobey Maguire to fork over $80,000 to settle lawsuit involving private high-stakes poker games
Don’t pay it, Tobey! They’re totally bluffing!

Justin Bieber flubs words to ”Santa Claus Is Coming to Town” during Today show performance
In his defense, he’d stayed up the whole night before studying for his paternity test. (Nailed it!)

Plans to continue One Life to Live, All My Children online nixed
Cancel me once, shame on you. Cancel me twice? Shame on my evil twin brother who’s sleeping with my fiancée.

Utah man is one of several people to reportedly suffer seizure while watching Breaking Dawn—Part 1: ”I didn’t really remember what happened after that. I think I blacked out”
Doctors are calling the man lucky, as others have suffered complete recall of the movie.

Backstage at a Florida concert opening for Rick Springfield, Jack Wagner meets 23-year-old daughter he didn’t know existed
Holy crap!!! Are you serious?!? Wagner is touring with Springfield?!?

Miley Cyrus caught on video making joke about smoking ”too much f—ing weed” after being presented with Bob Marley-themed birthday cake
Must have been the salvia talking.

Corbin Bernsen says he has collection of 8,000 snow globes, one of world’s biggest
Picture 8,000 finales of St. Elsewhere, but with less wonder and revelation.

The Green Dragon Inn set, built in New Zealand for The Hobbit‘s shoot, could become actual pub
Before you get too excited, read the sign out front: ”You must be this small to enter this establishment.”

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