1. Leonardo DiCaprio buys $100,000 eco-friendly sports car that gets 100 miles per gallon
And if he detaches the Ed Begley Jr. sidecar, it approaches 150 mpg.
2. Liam Gallagher sues brother Noel for saying he was once too hungover to perform
Lawsuits: For when fists, chair throwing, bat swinging, and name-calling just aren’t getting the job done.
3. Responding to noise complaints, cops reportedly crash Kim Kardashian-Kris Humphries wedding, asking them to turn it down
”The music?” asked Kim. ”EVERYTHING,” answered the cops.
4. AC/DC producing line of wines like ”Highway to Hell” cabernet sauvignon, ”Hells Bells” sauvignon blanc
While early sales of ”You Shirazed Me All Night Long” are a bit sluggish, the band is hoping that ”For Those About to Rosé, We Salute You” will boost orders in Q4.
5. Abercrombie & Fitch offers to pay The Situation to stop wearing its clothes
In related news, J.Crew and J-Woww have no business to attend to.
6. The Price Is Right cancels taping after Drew Carey separates clavicle in running accident
He’s lucky — if he’d fallen just two inches to the right, he would have shattered his Plinko chip in five places.
7. Ryan Gosling breaks up fight on Manhattan street
That’s a nice thing to do, but it was kind of his fault — they were arguing over whose abs looked more like Gosling’s.
8. South Pacific nation of Niue to allow people to use New Zealand Mint’s $2 Star Wars silver coins as currency
Government officials are urging C-3PO not to visit the island, fearing that he’d be looted and/or used as a down payment on a house.
9. Ex-Gossip Girl star Taylor Momsen says in interview that she has ”quit acting”
…like a brat?