Superman and Lois Lane haven’t been together forever. When the two characters were introduced in Action Comics #1 over 70 years ago, hard-edged Lois practically refused to give Superman’s nerdy alter ego Clark Kent the time of day. Lois was more interested in Superman: She spent most of her own comic book — Superman’s Girl Friend, Lois Lane — trying to get Supes to marry her by hook or by crook, but the superhero always turned her down. They danced this two-person three-way tango for decades — Clark loved Lois, Lois loved Superman, Superman wanted Lois to love Clark, etc. Then came the ’90s, the Era of Big Changes for Superheroes. In 1990, the couple got engaged; in 1996, they got married; and so they have remained ever since.
Until now. As part of DC Comics’ companywide reboot, Superman will commence living an exciting life of super-bachelorhood in September, while Lois will be seeing a co-worker, thus perpetuating the unlikely stereotype that journalists have active dating lives.
Keep in mind: Superman and Lois Lane aren’t getting divorced, per se. In this new reality, they will simply have never been together, although given how comic book reboots typically go, we can expect them to develop a sprightly will-they-or-won’t-they chemistry in about six months, followed by a first kiss in about two years and then a genuine relationship in about four years, at which point the timeline will be re-rebooted for the benefit of new comic book readers who are being born tomorrow. (It’s exactly like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.) Still, with writer Grant Morrison taking charge of the Superman reboot, I’m pretty excited to see what he does with a single-guy Superman. Imagine the pick-up lines! This plan can’t fail.
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