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Jon Stewart hook

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155554__amy_lOne night after gashing his right hand on a martini-glass while skewering Anthony Weiner’s weiner mea culpa, Jon Stewart used the accident as the primary hook in his opening monologue. (Eh? Ehh?) After thanking the doctor at Mount Sinai Hospital who stitched him up — and presumably gave him that adorable monkey bandage — Stewart recognized an unknown hero. “I really want to thank the kid who was obviously waiting for facial reconstruction surgery, you know, to let me jump the line,” he joked. “Because obviously, I had a reservation at Nobu at 8:30.”

Watch the clip after the jump:

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