The new Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides poster featuring Penélope Cruz is surprisingly tame, don’t you think? Go ahead. Study it. We’re practically forcing you to. Yes, the crossing of the swords draws your attention to her bosom, but there’s zero heaving. Normally, especially as a woman, I would applaud this lack of objectification. But this is Penélope Cruz, who director Pedro Almodóvar once said had one of the most spectacular cleavages in world cinema. Even I want a peek. I’m confident the film itself, which found a way to work in zombies and mermaids, will correct this oversight. In the meantime, let’s relive that 2006 conversation between Volver director Almodóvar, Cruz, and EW’s Missy Schwartz. Shall we…
EW In the press notes, you say that Penélope has one of the most spectacular cleavages in world cinema.
Almodóvar ¿Canalillo? ¿Cómo se dice?
Cruz ¿Canalillo? Cleavage.
EW Penélope, how do you feel about having the most spectacular cleavage in world cinema?
Cruz I’m gonna let him answer for me, because those were his words.
Almodóvar Absolutely, I am deeply in love with that part of her body. [To Cruz] You should be flattered. This is life. Not only something sexy. It’s also the base of life. You feed your future babies… [Cruz laughs] You will feed them with that. You also give pleasure to the men that you…
Almodóvar When you will be in love, that will be a fountain of pleasure, too.
Cruz Oh my God.
Almodóvar So it’s important. It’s life, pleasure, and spectacular. And everything is positive, related withel canalillo. [Cruz is hiding her face.]
EW [To Cruz] I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to embarrass you.
Cruz No, I never know what to say…
Almodóvar She’s very shy. Sometimes.
Cruz I always let him answer the question. I don’t talk about those things.
Almodóvar I remember in my childhood — because also this goes back to maternity — cleavage blessed by a lot of medals. This is an image that I have fixed in my mind. Two big boobs [extends hands in front of chest] but with many, many medals of the Virgin, like blessing this part of the female body.
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