It’s the final day of the Sweet 16. Who will earn the last two spots in the quarterfinals of our Big Shill Bracket Game? Can the Energizer Bunny keep on ticking when the Budweiser Clydesdales are still kicking? Progressive Lady defeated the Mac Guy, but now she’s facing someone even cuter than Justin Long — the Gerber Baby. Read their bios and watch them in action below, then vote in the polls.
THE ENERGIZER BUNNY
Product: Energizer batteries
Debut year: 1988
Catchphrase: They keep going and going…
Claim to fame: How many times did viewers get tricked into thinking they were watching some commercial, just to have the Energizer Bunny shuffle his way on screen, pounding his wee bunny drum, to the dulcet tones of “stiiiill going!”? Many, many times.
Strength: Endurance, of course.
Debut year: 1933
Catchphrase: “Clip-clop, clip-clop, clippety-clop”
Claim to fame: These majestic equines have been delivering beer for Anheuser-Busch since the end of prohibition, and their heart-warming commercials are must-sees during the winter holidays and the Super Bowl.
Strength: If the clydesdales weren’t already an American treasure, their post 9/11 ad put them on a sacred pedestal right next to apple pie and baseball.
Weakness: These blue-bloods can make Santa’s reindeer seem inclusive.
FLO, THE PROGRESSIVE LADY (Stephanie Courtney)
Product: Progressive Insurance
Debut year: 2008
Claim to fame: Flo doles out chipper insurance advice to clueless consumers in the world’s cleanest-ever insurance store.
Strength: Never-ending enthusiasm. Also: Bumpit.
Weakness: Did we mention the enthusiasm never ends? Also: Bumpit.
Product: The Gerber line of baby foods
Debut year: 1928
Catchphrase: That adorable punum is the sales pitch.
Claim to fame: Modeled after the five-month-old neighbor of artist Dorothy Hope Smith, she’s appeared on pretty much every Gerber product for over 80 years. (The baby grew up to be a high school English teacher and mystery novelist — which kinda makes sense, considering her identity remained a mystery for half a century.)
Strength: Unlike several other long-lasting mascots in this competition, she’s never needed to have any work done.
Weakness: All these years, and the rug rat still can’t say a single word.