TMZ that he would decline an invitation to host the Golden Globes for a third time, following his controversial turn Sunday night. And, really, that’s incredibly unfortunate, since 40 hours after the ceremony, we’re finally getting official measurements of the host’s performance on the Lange/Colbert Scale. For those of you unfamiliar with that particular scientific metric, the Lange/Colbert Scale assesses the cleverness, cajones, and comic reverberations of a guest’s performance. At one end of the sliding scale is Artie Lange, whose irreverently crude hijacking of Joe Buck’s HBO sports talk show scored an awful/awesome 0.2 on the LCS. At the other end of the scale was Stephen Colbert’s in-the-face heckling of a sitting U.S. president and the White House press corp: an unprecedented 10.1 on the LCS, which until that incident, only went up to 10.0.This hour, Ricky Gervais is making headlines for telling
Somewhere in between was Gervais’ act on Sunday night. He ripped into several easy celebrity targets, metaphorically knocked the teeth out of Hollywood Foreign Press Association prez, Philip Berk — before joking that he helped put them back in — and left some of the audience in the theater simmering. He even rocked the Hollywood third-rail: Scientology. But just as some angry HFPA members were promising retribution, Jon Stewart and Chelsea Handler’s minions were lauding Gervais’ feat. Popular opinion was also strongly in his corner, according to our poll.
But now, we have official scientific evidence: Gervais’ eruption measured a 6.4 on the Lange/Colbert Scale. It’s a complicated formula, so I won’t bore you with the math, but he certainly got points for screaming to millions what many only dare whisper to their friends. Clearly, he also lost points for being a party-pooper, and planting the mental image of Hugh Hefner without his smoking robe. Sure, Gervais has announced that he would not return as Globes host, but can we all agree the ratings for such a show would dwarf anything the Globes can imagine?
So there you have it. The debate, for some reason, continues, but if someone asks you how Gervais did at the Globes, you can tell him with confidence: 6.4.