The new extended trailer for Jersey Shore season 3 has arrived, giving us a better sense of the complex plotlines we’ll see play out when the gang returns to Seaside Heights. New cast member Deena is “exactly like Snooki,” according to Sammi, and haven’t we all been feeling like the show could use another Snooki? (Deena’s first line in the trailer: “It took a day for someone to see my goods!” We really have to do something about our education system.) Also, J-Woww is going through a painful break-up, which is sad, but Snooki gets arrested, which is even sadder. (“I’m a good person!” she screams.) At one point, Sammi appears to leave the house … for good? And, finally,, Ronnie gets a proctology exam. Or anyways, it looks like a proctology exam. And if it walks like a duck and it talks like a duck, it’s a proctology exam. “Hell has to be just like this,” says Vinny, a clear reference to Jean-Paul Sartre’s No Exit. Watch it all below…
PopWatchers, I find myself almost unbearably excited about this new season. Are you looking forward to the Angelina-free shenanigans? Hoping that Deena and Snooki will re-enact the Marx Brothers’ Mirror Gag? Praying that J-Woww won’t rebound from her ex right into the waiting arms of any man she lives with?
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