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”Brains go out the window as soon as you walk through those doors.” —Brendon, inadvertently describing every contestant from every season, on Big Brother

”I’m excited to destroy you.” —Russell (Denis O’Hare), to Eric (Alexander Skarsgård), on True Blood

”Maybe I’m too old-fashioned for this show. I just can work with sluts and old ladies.” —Casanova on Project Runway

”Bristol Palin will also be competing — because the rhythm method has worked very well for her in the past.” —Joel McHale, on the teen mom joining Dancing With the Stars, on The Soup

”Where is Matt Lauer?” —Katy Perry, disappointed to be interviewed by Ann Curry, on the Today show