And I need about 2 years straight to wash my eyes repeatedly with Clorox to erase the visuals of tonight’s kissing contest from my memory. I won’t go into any more detail — in deference to spoilerphobes, and also to keep from barfing on my computer — but suffice it to say that the Bachelor Pad contestants had to put their money where their mouth is… or really, they had to put their mouths where many, many people had been before. Stay tuned for my full TV recap (UPDATE: Click over to read the full Bachelor Pad recap) and Chris Harrison’s exclusive Bachelor Pad blog later tonight, but in the meantime, let’s work through this trauma together: Were you surprised by who won? Did I miss something, or did Tenley actually make it through this whole episode without crying? And will the “insiders” destroy us all? Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go drink a bottle of Listerine. Maybe two.