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Dan Snierson's Hit List

10 hot topics for the week of June 13, 2010

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1. Angelina Jolie may play Cleopatra in biopic
She’s hot. She kissed her brother. Heck, slap an asp bite on this girl and you won’t be able to tell the two apart.

2. The Karate Kid grosses $55.7 million in opening weekend
How powerful is Will Smith? Guy can have sex and, 12 years later, parlay it into a No. 1 film at the box office.

3. January Jones involved in car accident, claims she was being harassed by paparazzi
She was so distraught afterward, she lit a cigarette and stared pensively out a window.

4. Donald Trump wants to cast Lindsay Lohan on The Celebrity Apprentice
Of course, she’d get special treatment: In the event of elimination, instead of ”You’re fired!” the Donald will simply say ”SCRAM!”

5. American Idol‘s Jason Castro to guest-star on The Bold and the Beautiful
He’ll shoot the episode in one studio, while in the studio next door his dreads continue to work on his next album.

6. Paula Deen’s housekeeper arrested for allegedly stealing Deen’s jewelry
No one touches the deep-fried Twinkie necklace.

7. Ozzy Osbourne helps crowd at Dodgers — Angels game set Guinness world record for longest, loudest scream
It was much more successful than the time he tried to bite the heads off a thousand baseball bats.

8. Woman busted on charges of assaulting Bam Margera with bat
On the plus side, that’s one less scene to shoot for Jackass 3D.

9. The Go-Go’s cancel summer farewell tour after guitarist Jane Wiedlin falls during hike
Probably wasn’t the best idea to rehearse ”Head Over Heels” on the trails.

10. David Hasselhoff to be roasted on Comedy Central
”You don’t have to invite me twice to a roast,” said Hasselhoff. ”In fact, I love burgers so much I’d practically eat them off the ground.”