Did you really think I wouldn’t post about Tina Fey’s Duncan Hines Brownie Husband commercial? (Read EW’s full ‘SNL’ recap.) Consider this area a safe place lined with jelly and your future fat rolls. I’ve been whittling down this very important list to what I think is a fairly decent Top 5. Be sure to list your own selections in the comments.
OTHER FOODS OF WHICH I’D WANT MY FOOD-HUSBAND TO CONSIST
5. Parmigiano Reggiano, because I deserve the best in 100 percent Pure [Night] Cheese
4. Pastrami on rye with mustard. “You are hot tonight!” — George Costanza
3. Red gummy matter (already exists, but not to scale)
2. Chicken liver pate, because I could only handle like one bite of that mess per day. He’d last so long. And I like a gamey musk.
1. Still brownie, but needs to be chocolate-chip mix and frosted in “mint” green
Tina had it right all along. Refresh yourself with goopy bites of the Brownie Husband video, after the jump.
If the women-wooing-nonhumans thing turns you on or creeps you out in a good way, consider watching Hooverphonic’s video for “Mad About You.” Plant love. A little sicker?
Annie on Twitter: @EWAnnieBarrett