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Why can't America have a heavy-metal dinosaur band for children?

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Hevisaurus is a kid-geared metal band from Finland whose members are dinosaurs. Why must America be saddled with Barney when such obviously awesome dinotainment is available?

Another one of their videos:

Suddenly Yo Gabba Gabba seems so tame. Here they are performing live with what appears to be a small child in a KISS outfit (?):

And finally, a clip from Dinosaurs, because no matter how hardcore Hevisaurus is, I kept expecting one of them to say “not the mama”:

Do you like your children’s music to rock this hard, PopWatchers, or are you sticking with your Raffi jams, thankyouverymuch?

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