The comic and former Seinfeld writer dishes on being the first to be fired by the Donald on NBC’s The Celebrity Apprentice
I’m a pragmatic person, so going into it I knew that I had a one-in-fourteen chance of winning and a one-in-fourteen chance of being the first one fired. I am kind of disappointed, though, because I’m such a huge fan of the show, and when I watched it I would think, ”I’d really be good at this game.” But it just kind of all blew up in my face, with everybody throwing me under the bus.
What they didn’t show was that Trump made it really clear in the boardroom that even though Cyndi Lauper was the project manager and they usually take the fall in that situation, he was like, ”I don’t want to fire Cyndi. I don’t want to fire Cyndi.” Then I started getting worried, because I also know as a TV producer that of course you don’t want to fire Cyndi — she’s one of the biggest names on this season, so you can’t fire her first. So that’s when I started to get worried, but I just wish they had shown that, because that was an important part of the boardroom and they left it out.
It’s embarrassing to go so early, but I’ve had a few months to get over it. What’s really so funny about this thing is that when you’re fired, they ask you to have breakfast the next day with the executive producers. I said sure, and they said, ”Oh, really?” They were surprised; they said that a lot of times people won’t come because they were fired and they’re so mad. And then when you meet with the executive producers over breakfast, they actually offer you therapy! They say, ”I know this is hard, and if you want a therapist we have somebody you can talk to.” I’m just sitting there thinking, ”You do realize that this is a reality show and I just got fake-fired by Donald Trump, right?” (As told to Keith Staskiewicz)