I simply couldn’t go the whole day without somehow calling attention to Bret Michaels’ glistening heavage during confessional shots on last night’s Celebrity Apprentice. EWWWW.com. What makes it even crueler is that you can see buttons on a different layer of clothing than the one committing the heavage foul. His conscious choice to display heavage is thrice removed from the heavage itself. Four times removed if you count his weave-enabling bandana! And “diabeet-uhs” must have something to do with this, so I’m going to blame that, too.
In his extensive recap of last night’s Celebrity Apprentice premiere, Dalton Ross argues that Trump’s stars-out-of-their-element series is “the silliest show ever.” Though Dalton’s argument is valid in a “Sinbad, could you get me a soda?” type of way, (“It doesn’t come close to making sense on any level whatsoever — and that’s precisely why it’s so damn entertaining”), my gut instinct tells me Dancing With the Stars falls into the same category, and is maybe even a bit sillier, if only on a visual level — Bret Michaels’ above heavage offense would be not only wildly endorsed by DWTS fans, but emulated, and then some, by every male dance pro. And let’s face it: My gut also wanted to try that $5,000 cream-of-some-young-guy risotto or whatever team Hard Penis was planning last night, so maybe I’m just being…silly.
What is the most ridiculous show you watch? And would you watch three hours of it instead of two?
Dalton’s ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ premiere recap
Annie on Twitter: @EWAnnieBarrett