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'Models of the Runway' recap: Trashy

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This week, I bit the bullet and watched Models of the Runway on fast-forward until it was time to choose models. It ended up being a great show. What pretty creatures! Cerri, the porcelain doll with the hot Irish accent, yelled at everyone for leaving their trash on the floor, Top Model-style. Heidi let her weird group therapy, and because it was so sped up, it wasn’t awkward at all! The fake mommies and fake daughters had a sad models-only picnic in Central Park. During this carefully staged event, Megan’s face suggested a liveliness so rare that slowed it down to real-time to discover that Megan and her mini happened to worship the same three deities: Hannah Montana, the color pink, and their hair. Then the models stomped around in the breezeway with puzzling giant orange spheres right behind the EW office, which Tanner and I call Gossip Cove. Oh, no! What if we’d seen them? THINGS ARE SUDDENLY HITTING TOO CLOSE TO HOME. I promise, Internet, just like last week: I will never write about Models of the Runway again. Find out which designers chose which models after the jump, and read Missy Schwartz’ Project Runway recap

‘PROJECT RUNWAY’ DESIGNER/MODEL PAIRINGS FOR NEXT WEEK

Seth Aaron thought he’d “stick with good integrity”: Valeria

Emilio chose Holly

Anthony “will take” Kristina

Mila wanted Brandise again (Lorena was confused: they won a challenge together)

Maya‘s been trying to get Lorena since day one

Jesse wants to “do it again” with Alexis

Ben thought this time he’d go with Alison

Amy picked Monique, who noticed, “I’m her first non-blonde!”

Jonathan picked Cerri because “us pale people need to stick together”

Jay, after much hesitation, chose Brittany

Bye, Megan.

Will anyone else try the fast-forward trick next week?

Annie on Twitter: @EWAnnieBarrett