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'Cougar Town' recap: The funniest lines from last night's episode (with Lisa Kudrow)

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If you’re not a regular Cougar Town watcher and tuned in last night to see the much-advertised Courteney Cox-Lisa Kudrow (Valerie Cherish, I still miss you!) reunion, congratulations! You caught one helluva funny episode — and have hopefully added this gem to your “series recording” list. That said, while the erstwhile Friends were terrific (as anticipated) no one scored more laughs than Busy Philipps as clueless assistant Laurie. In fact, Philipps was so genius last night, I’ve got to break out her best zingers into their own “Top 6” subset. Without further ado…

6. (Talking to conquest Smith Frank) “What? You have a last-name first name, and a first-name last name? Take me home right now!”

5. (Arguing that single women have it tougher than single men) “So much harder! Do you read Cathy?”

4. (Responding to a Good Will Hunting reference by Jules) “If Matt Damon weren’t married, and if he weren’t a movie star, and if he lived in this town, I really think we would date.”

3. (Shocked to hear the word “couth” used by a man) “Grayson, that is a word only women are allowed to use when they’re really angry with another woman!”

2. (Needs no explanation) “I swear, if I ever have a white baby, I am totally naming him Smith.”

1. (Complaining about having to wear a suit) “I feel like that lady that comes to your house every six months when you’re a kid and decides whether or not you get to keep living there.”

Oh, and let’s not forget Grayson’s “Political Parties 101” class for Laurie, complete with chalkboard drawings of a donkey and an elephant.

Grayson: “Donkey likes hybrids, health care, and homosexuals. And elephant likes God.”

Laurie: “I saw an elephant pray at a circus once.”

Cox and Kudrow (as a vicious dermatologist with a superiority complex)  had some awesome exchanges as well, none better than Jules getting short of breath after Dr. Evans aimed her she-beast laser at Jules’ profession: “Real estate’s what you do when you have no other options. You know, I guess it’s like being a stripper, except you get to see your face on a bus bench. Well, not this face, of course, the air-brushed version.” And then there was Dr. Evans showing up unexpectedly at Jules’ house, on the arm of Jules’ ex Bobby: “Hi Jules. Oh, you need more chardonnay! And better chardonnay.”

We also got treated to a bawdy, random moment when the guys dared Jules that any woman could cold-call any male stranger on the phone, offer to have sex with him, and get an automatic “yes.” Not surprisingly, the guys had it, but the twist was seeing Jules (who didn’t follow through with the offer, obvs) in bed later that day — next to her boyfriend — yet still offering the guy life advice: “Tom, I gotta call you back! Good luck with the interview!” Cougar Town (and its protagonist) may have sex on the brain, but its heart shows up at the most unexpected times and places, which is why it’s become my favorite new show of the season.

Oh, now before I turn it over to you to add your own favorite zingers in the comments section, let’s hear from the indomitable Barb, who (YES!) made a brief appearance in Dr. Evans’ lobby. Which of her lines made you chuckle more? “Welcome to the time machine, ladies! Which of the many fine doctors here are you seeing?” Or “See you in two days — when I emerge from my chrysalis!”?

Image Credit: Karen Neal/ABC