· Neil Patrick Harris hosts 2009, and we give him a standing O.
· Yes, we respect wood! And the updated Seinfeld finale, courtesy of Curb Your Enthusiasm.
· Wanting Nurse Jackie as our friend but not necessarily as our health care professional
· World doesn’t end! In your face, 2012, Knowing, and The Road.
· If someone combined Ruby and Hoarders, we’d never have to watch another cable show.
· Good use of balloons: Up
· Takeaway from The Hangover: All babies should wear sunglasses.
· Kelly Clarkson: ”I Do Not Hook Up”
· Katy Perry and Russell Brand: They do hook up. Ewwww.
· Unable to find a boyfriend named Kabbalah, Madonna settles for Jesus.
· Things that Aretha puts on her head
· Bad use of balloons: Balloon Boy
· Clutching your face on your album cover like part of it is about to fall off (See: Rihanna, Adam Lambert, Susan Boyle)
· Still ashamed of the two days this summer when we were obsessed with I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here!
· Jessica Simpson survives natural disaster in Japan, while her sister, Ashlee, creates one on the new Melrose Place.
· Jeremy Piven complains about mercury poisoning and man boobs. Prediction for 2010: hemorrhoids and irritable bowel syndrome.
· The Top Model melee: Not since Dorothy arrived in Oz have so many short people rioted.
· Wait, why aren’t we still talking about Mackenzie Phillips?
· J. Lo falls in her Louboutins; response is far less sympathetic than she had hoped.
· Levi Johnston doesn’t bare it all in Playgirl. Can he do nothing right?