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The Bullseye of the Decade

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HITS
· 27 million albums sold, 7 Grammys, and 1 Oscar: Our life would suck without the American Idol alumni.
· ”Gretchen, stop trying to make ‘fetch’ happen! It’s not going to happen!”
· Advice to live by: (1) Cut a hole in a box. (2) Put your junk in that box. (3) Make her open the box.
· Team Aniston, Team Jacob, Team Lauren, and Team Rosie
· The triumphant comeback of Ellen DeGeneres. Plus, she lands a hot wife.
· Al Gore loses election but gets best consolation prize ever.
· 2007: a good year for umbrellas (See: Rihanna)

NEAR MISSES
· ”You’re fired!”; ”The Tribe has spoken”; ”You are the weakest link. Goodbye”; and all the other catchphrases we ran into the ground.
· The term ”hot mess” in 2006
· Secretly cheering on the swan that tried to strangle Björk
· 2007: a bad year for umbrellas (See: Britney Spears)
· No Country for Old Men wins numerous awards but fails to revive Dorothy Hamill haircut.

MISSES
· Jessica Simpson: Chicken? Fish? Or just stupid?
· My Big Fat Greek Wedding deludes plain Janes into thinking that John Corbett is dying to marry them and put up with their overbearing family.
· Polaroid goes bankrupt in 2001; worse yet, ”shake it like a Polaroid picture” becomes the ”Macarena” of the ’00s.
· Oscar voters show they can quit Brokeback Mountain; award Crash Best Picture instead.
· Does poor Halle still gag when she sees the photo of Adrien Brody kissing her? We do.
· Bad Chads of the decade: hanging chad, pregnant chad, Chad Michael Murray
· The term ”hot mess” after 2006
· Silly Y2K paranoia

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