Last night’s Colbert Report featured popular zombie-killer Woody Harrelson, who stars as casualty notification officer Tony in The Messengers. (The film opens in NYC and D.C. this weekend — EW’s Owen Gleiberman gives it a B+.) Colbert asked some tough questions (“What are you doing in a movie that supports our troops?…Should we keep portraying the dark side of war?”) and later got down to the real purpose of the segment, which was to shave Harrelson’s noggin. Marvel at the pair’s harmonious rendition of “The Star-Spangled Banner” — and Colbert’s intuition on just how fast to tenderly manipulate an electric razor to get the job done during the last bar — below.
I’m also obsessed with how Miracle Whip bought space in every ad break of last night’s Report. “We are Miracle Whip, and we will not tone it down, STEPHEN,” blared the personalized commercial. Colbert responded on the show by promising to use the extra cash flow to purchase more mayonnaise than ever. (Here’s the pretext: Colbert mocked Miracle Whip’s over-the-top commercials in mid-October.) OH IT’S ON! A piece of bread probably. Vote below in the most important poll you’ll see all day.