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The bullseye

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HITS
· George Clooney, star of Fantastic Mr. (Silver) Fox
· The ”Save Southland” campaign Lucy Liu should only wear her Irene Diamond Award Gala dress when leaving the house.
· This book: Buy Ketchup in May and Fly at Noon
· Adam Lambert’s new single ”Time for Miracles.” Rejected title: ”Kris Allen Is Going to Need a Miracle to Outsell My Album.”
· Alanis Morrissette and Alicia Silverstone: We miss 1996 so much.
· Ivanka Trump promotes new book on TV talk shows; proves that fabulousness is learned, not genetic.

NEAR MISSES
· Sarah Palin to appear on Oprah: We can see crazy from our house.
· Natalie Imbruglia wants a comeback. We’re torn.
· Encyclopedia of Pasta: Cute idea, but Bullseye doesn’t eat carbs.
· Lindsay Lohan and Kim Cattrall: What’s the word for a same-sex cougar couple?
· Annoying consequence of swine flu paranoia: the greasy feeling on your hands after you Purell them.

MISSES
· Lesson of the week for Gerard Butler: Pop culture isn’t interested in you unless you’re shirtless.
· William Shatner: What’s this I hear about a movie called Driving Miss Daisy? Morgan Freeman: Just take the #@!* photo already.
· Gosselins rejoice. Heene is now the most insulting word in the English language.
· With that vomiting scene on The Office and Balloon Boy upchucking on the Today show, NBC seems to be the only network celebrating National Barf Month.
· Lindsay Lohan and Donatella Versace: Before and after
· We’d say we expect more from Kate Hudson than a belly chain, but we really don’t.

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