What’s this? You thought I was going to go 24 hours without posting a Music Mix item about American Idol‘s beloved eighth-season Kradison trio? Well you thought wrong, Blanche! But I obsess not just for the fanboy fun of it, but because, well, every day (and sometimes twice a day) there’s breaking news coming out of the Kris Allen-Adam Lambert-Allison Iraheta camp. Today’s big to-do: The premiere of Adam Lambert’s “Time for Miracles” video. I know, I know, I’m a little tardy for the party in weighing in — just because I make Real Housewives references doesn’t mean I actually watch that messerie, BTW — but because it’s only been 48 hours since I wrote a 781-word essay/review/tone poem about the full-length track, a little distance seemed necessary. Now, however, without further ado, here are the Top 5 Things That Went Through My Mind While Watching the “Time for Miracles” Video:
1) Yes! Adam moodily posing on a moodily lit rooftop is an image worthy of repeat viewings.
2) Adam moodily strolling in front of a green-screen on which images of global destruction/panic-stricken masses fly by? Not quite as much.
3) I know this video would be kind of a sadtrombone.com if there wasn’t a mood change from the “everyone’s gonna die” theme that dominates the first three-quarters of the video, but I wonder why 2012‘s producers think it’s a good idea to show us what’s seemingly a shot of doomsday survivors emerging from cold storage at the 3:39 mark. Yeah, yeah, we all know a big-budget studio flick will inevitably have a happy ending — “Humanity’s been wiped out…except for the 22 of us!” — but that doesn’t mean we want to see said ending played out as music-video backdrop before we plunk down our $12.50 for the full monty. Actually, on second thought, there’s no way in Wasilla I was gonna pay money to see this flick…so maybe I should shut up and thank Adam and the makers of this video for helping me maintain my pop-cultural literacy with a freebie crib sheet.
4) Adam’s tousled, jet-black mop is a thing of ridiculous beauty, but my mom is going to be totes disappointed that he’s dialed back on the guyliner. Yes, people, sad to say that five months after the season 8 finale, Polly Slezak has not yet managed to perfect the “Glambert eye” she became so obsessed with between February and May of 2009.
5) Those lava bubbles at the start of the video make me think about one of my favorite things in the world to look at: Black-lit jellyfish at the aquarium. And that’s a good thing!
5a) My comrade Leah Greenblatt makes a salient observation: “Cool Guys Don’t Look at Explosions.”
Okay, check out the “Time for Miracles” video for yourself, then post your own review in the comments section. And because I’m shameless, I will once again request that you follow me on Twitter @EWMichaelSlezak. Holla! Hey-ey!
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