EW Staff
October 09, 2009 AT 04:00 AM EDT

”You have a family to support — and a body to dismember!” — Harry (James Remar), reminding his serial-killer son Dexter of his priorities, on Dexter

”You guys look like the world’s worst Benetton ad.” — April (Kristin Chenoweth), upon meeting the glee club, on Glee

”Our first assignment is a documentary. They’re like real movies, but with ugly people.” — Abed (Danny Pudi), after enrolling in a film class, on Community

”Today is the 50th anniversary of the first episode of The Twilight Zone. Or is it?” — Jimmy Fallon on Late Night

”It’s awkward asking people for money, but we could really use it. Why doesn’t Crate & Barrel let you register for a toaster full of cash?” — Pam (Jenna Fischer), trying to persuade her wedding guests to give money, on The Office

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