For anyone whose ever thought about Xena‘s homoerotic tendencies or wondered if Peppermint Patty had more of a thing for Sally than Charlie Brown, your musings have been answered in Comedy.com’s list of 15 TV Characters Who Never Came Out of the Closet (But Should Have). The countdown isn’t all that shocking, but I love their rationale. (The Partridge Family‘s Reuben Kincaid: “He was a 40-something single man who worked in the entertainment industry and had a large collection of snazzy wool sports coats.”)
As for the less-than-shocking, No. 4 is Waylon Smithers (pictured), who’s never at a loss for some sexual innuendo directed squarely at the most unattractive of targets — Mr. Burns. “What is the deal with Smithers?” you may have asked yourself (though it’s become more and more obvious as the years have rolled by). Well, someone else had the same question in mind, as you may have seen on The Simpsons‘ 138th Episode Spectacular (video after the jump).
As for Comedy.com’s No. 1 pick, Bert and Ernie, perhaps it’s a case of reading too much into things, but, um, hello — eternal roommates? Baths? I think this Family Guy clip sums up what we’ve all been thinking for so long:
Looking at the list, it’s no surprise that most of the characters are from yesteryear, before shows like Ellen, Will & Grace, Ugly Betty, and Glee made positive portrayals of gay characters as unremarkable as a container of syrup next to a plate of diner pancakes. In fact, I’m hard-pressed to think of any recent characters who could make this list* I’m sure many of you want to say Nate or Chuck from Gossip Girl, as in Nate and Chuck, but jury’s out on that one for me.
Can you guys think of any characters on TV now who need to burst through the closet door already? Any other characters from back in the day who need to be added to the list?
* I do think Stewie from Family Guy should have made the list, but perhaps he was left off because Seth MacFarlane recently cleared up that little Stew is as gay as Brian’s cousin Jasper (and because he’s, ya know, an infant). But he’s still fair game because he never actually came out on the show, right?